I just bought a panty and bralette set because they have a subtle wonder woman/patriotc vibe. Blue and black with gold and red accents.
I still have a social interaction hangover from being “on tour” then a three day break and then conference. So very sick of being on. So very sick of being the work persona version of myself. The Midwestern meet everyone’s needs version of myself. I narrowly avoided having to go to Detroit for two days but now I have to go speak on a panel tonight. It is just. Ugh. And the internet is down at my house and I’ve had to call people about that.
All I want to do is go home and play with my new colorguard flag from DCDD and practice that toss and Not Talk to People. Unfortunately my weekend will be full of Easter celebrations which I shouldn’t resent but I do because I cannot take one more fucking day in a row of having to get up early, shower, do the hair, put on a blazer, and get along with people.
One day I asked a friend for a tampon and she balked.
"I have a pad," she said. "But no tampons."
"You out?" I asked.
"I don’t use them."
"Really?" I said, trying to hide my surprise.
"I can’t. I don’t want to have to touch…" she paused. "Down there." She whispered it quietly the same way my family whispers the word cancer.
"How do you masturbate?" I blurted out. She turned beet read and, as if on queue, the buzzer for the dryer went off and I’ve never seen anyone so happy as my friend raced on to rescue the clothes from the dryer and herself from the conversation
Also this part. THIS PART. COOL FRIEND. I love how the author is completely oblivious to the fact that this little anecdote makes her come off like a giant asshole.
Clearly your friend had some issues with discussing her own sexual health/practices and instead of simply respecting her privacy and changing the conversation you asked her about masturbation. Sure! The woman who is embarrassed to put a tampon in or say the word vagina is totally going to be cool with discussing how she does/does not masturbate with you. Did you ever stop to think that maybe your questioning was upsetting your so-called friend? Do you even care?
I’m sex positive which is why my occasional shaming of other women who I believe are DOING IT WRONG is acceptable!
Friend of a friend has a year-long fellowship to explore sex-positive queerness and this kind of shaming “sex positivity” is all she talks about. It surprised me to learn that there are even more wrong ways queer people can engage in sex. I’m slowly getting her uninvited to all gatherings.